Today I was confronted by my reflection in the window, as I walked past my office. I still see the same old me! Why is it that the image of yourself takes the longest to change. Let me explain: lately I have been comparing myself to other overweight women that happen to walk by me during my daily activities. “ …am I as big as her, or smaller?” the hardest thing to let go of is your own self image. Of course in the case of anorexics they have a genuine sickness, and only see fat on there body when they look at themselves in the mirror. For me, as I look every morning in the mirror after my shower, I still see the same body shape as I was 10 months ago. It’s weird how when one losses weight, your body shrinks and this is because indeed you loose from the inside not the outside. So kind of like an imploding balloon, the shape doesn’t really change. It just shrinks. So looking at myself, I still see the 2 large tires on my stomach, and my large butt and wide hips and thighs. Not to mention my double chin. ( although THAT I can see is getting smaller… ) my clothes are getting loser everyday. I have gone from a size 32 to a size 24 ! but still I feel huge!
I am going the opera tonight. I going to see; Prokofiev’s masterpiece, War and Peace. The last time I went, Toronto’s new opera house , The Four Season Centre for the Performing Arts, had just opened. I was confronted with the fact that I DIDN’T fit in the seat! How embarrassing. No matter how hard I tried to jam my fat hips into the chair, between the arm rests, it wouldn’t budge! I had to watch the whole 3 hour opera from sitting on the staircase
( to which technically wasn’t aloud because of the fire code..) I will be able to properly judge my weight-loss from how I fit into the seat tonight! I am excited, that I could possible actually enjoy a theatre performance without feeling that my hips are cracking under the pure pressure of the armrest that are jamming into my sides. Not to mention taking up the back space of the persons sits to either side of me. Squish!
**Tip for the day: Sitting down and getting up of the couch or chair without using your hands is a great exercise. Grab a heavy item, like that heavy hardback copy of the Book War & Peace, hold with your between your two hands, above your head, and stand up and sit down on the couch during every commercial break of your 1 hour TV series tonight. If you do this during every commercial, for the duration of the 1 hour TV show, you will have burned about 200 calories, plus it’s a great strengthening exercise for your back and abs.. the core muscles!!
3 days ago